A Double Standard…

Over the weekend I celebrated my 22nd anniversary with my wife at Disneyland. It was enjoyable, if not surprisingly hot trip, with temps in Anaheim reaching over 90 degrees. Maybe its a sign of age, but this is the first time in any of our many trips to the park that we had to duck into somewhere and sit for a while to cool of and collect ourselves! That being said, its amazing what a 15 minute break in the air conditioning will do for you. To top it all off there was a Halloween event going on that I didn’t know about, but would explain why it was so difficult to find a hotel room. The one we got was an awful place in what can only be described as the literally butt-crack of Disneyland, and I will never, ever return! I’d rather walk six miles to the park and back than stay in that creepy place again!

That story, however, is not the point of this post (thanks for reading though)! Upon our return Sunday morning we crashed and slept in early only to wake up and find ourselves in needing to prepare for the birthday party of one of my nephews. The little guy is five years old now, and despite my dedication to hanging out with family I would have stayed home and slept, but my wife promised to bring some food, so we had to go. It was a good time and afterward all the family members headed out around the corner to grab some food from a great little pizza place around the corner.

This is where things started to get interesting. To me, at least.

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Little Things Matter.

A lot of Christians will tell you that “the little things matter” when it comes to worshiping, praising or giving thanks to God. Many pray before each meal, to give the Lord thanks for His provisions. They say little prayers when they hear about someone in trouble, and make sure to give “glory to God” when they hear about the Lord answering a prayer.  When it comes to obedience we try to avoid “worldly” things like watching movies with excessive sex or violence. We listen to Christian music or, a most, music that is non-offensive, avoiding cursing or sexual innuendos. These “little things” matter.

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Conflict of Interest…

Why is it that Christians say they know that Gods word and the world conflict, yet they are remiss to do what Gods word says? Instead they follow the worlds word and then can’t figure out why things aren’t working out! A perfect example is a woman’s place in Gods plan for life. Millions of women are suffering from mental disorders that get classified as ‘depression’, and I have no doubt that many do suffer clinical depression from chemical imbalances and such, but how many simply suffer ‘depression’ because they are suffering due to fighting against Gods will?

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Daily Goals?

Ladies, when you wake up in the morning what is your “daily goal”? Do you aspire to hit the gym harder than yesterday? Get the house cleaned? Get the kids ready and off to school? Where does your husband end up in all of this? Is he the LAST thing on your mind? The last one to get your attention?

Woman was made by God for man as a helper. Are you helping your husband daily or does he get the left overs of whatever is left of your time, your day and your energy? If your goal every day is to serve God your goal would best be reached serving your husband. It is, after all, what you were created for, to help him. That may sound sexist or misogynistic or overly simplified, but if your a Christian woman you need only look at the bible for the truth:

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Suspected Blue Pills

Recently I have started looking around for a new church to attend, and the choices are many, as it seems my side of town almost literally has a church every few blocks. Now, one might thing this a good thing, but I know of at least a few that are churches in name only, as I am familiar with how they do things within their walls and, personally, do not approve. I have attended at least two of these churches and have left them for various reasons, not all due to conflicts in scripture, but I have watched those churches devolve into places that run based on warped scripture.

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Was thinking about this yesterday on my long drive home from a software convention:

John 8:

1 Jesus went unto the mount of Olives.

And early in the morning he came again into the temple, and all the people came unto him; and he sat down, and taught them.

And the scribes and Pharisees brought unto him a woman taken in adultery; and when they had set her in the midst,

They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act.

Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayest thou?

This they said, tempting him, that they might have to accuse him. But Jesus stooped down, and with his finger wrote on the ground, as though he heard them not.

So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.

And again he stooped down, and wrote on the ground.

And they which heard it, being convicted by their own conscience, went out one by one, beginning at the eldest, even unto the last: and Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst.

10 When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?

11 She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.

Something interesting about these scriptures is that I have heard a myriad of assumptions about the whereabouts of the male companion of this woman. Everything from “they let him off the hook”, to “he was probably standing right there accusing her” has been floated around by many of the pastors I have listened to.

However, I have another take on the location of our adulterous friend:

He was already dead.

From what I understand the Pharisees were pretty big sticklers on the law, though they used it to garner recognition, respect and likely money for themselves. Letting this man go, who was “taken in adultery” (meaning he was caught, along with the woman) would have likely reflected very poorly on them and as we can see by these verses they were well versed in knowing what the law stated was the punishment for this couple.

The difference, however, is that likely figured they had the upper hand by presenting a woman, whom others could likely find sympathy for, to Jesus, and using that sympathy to trap Him. Had Jesus said “Yeah, so stone her then” (which He could have, it was the appropriate punishment for the crime, after all) he would have looked like an unsympathetic and heartless fellow, while discounting her crime altogether would have put Him at odds with the law.

Her paramour, however, would not be so lucky. Likely there would have been little sympathy for a man caught in the act of adultery, and because they were caught in the act it would make sense that they would immediately pull him to the edge of town and mete out the penalty.

Run that scenario past the next person who tries to tell you how society in the time of Jesus was so misogynistic that this man, this adulterer, of who’s whereabouts are not specifically mentioned in the text, probably got off the hook because “male privilege” or some such rot.

Clearing the Blight.

So, if your a Christian guy like me, married, in your forties (EARLY forties, I found out) you might find yourself in my situation: married to a Christian woman who has been trained, by the church, to study apart from her husband and, if at odds with her husband, to rely on the ‘experts’ rather than following his lead on scripture. She may have been trained to submit only when she feels its appropriate or that “as unto the Lord” (in Ephesians 5:22) means that she is only to submit when she feels her husband is making requests that echo Christ. Perhaps she believes that Paul was a woman-hater and intentionally wrote the prohibitions on women teaching or speaking in the church or covering their heads when they pray because misogyny was a normal as breathing back in ancient times.

And if you were a Christian guy like me, who was trained up very similarly but found out that the church has been being compromised by a feminist mindset and, after much introspection, prayer, reading and research you found it to be true, you might decide it was time to turn back to the bible and get in line with what it really says and means and not what certain people “interpret” it to mean by filtering it through the culture first and coming up with things that make one feel like they are being obedient to Christ when, in fact, they are not (by the bibles standards, not mine).

This being said, how does one proceed convincing ones wife that the church has been training people up in this way? Even if it is not maliciously done, it is still being done! Even if it sounds right to say men and women are equal and that women should be teaching classes and becoming pastors and putting raising a family aside so they can pursue a ‘fulfilling’ career before settling with a sad sap excuse of a man in their 30s and 40s: This doesn’t make it right.

Does one go about pointing out that ones wife is in sin? I mean, full fledged, double-barreled, no-holds-barred, “Hey, you are in sin and this is why. You need to address it?”, or do you go the more slow and subtle route? I mean, sin is sin, and if a fellow brother is doing something in direct violation of the scripture then you need to approach him and tell him straight out, right?

“Look, the bible says x is sin, you are doing x, you are in sin. Repent.”

Seems simple enough, doesn’t it? Does it really work when someone “interprets” a scripture differently than you, though?

I mean, if I tell my wife that wives are told to submit unto their husbands in EVERYTHING as unto the Lord, to me it seems very cut and dry. Submit to your husband, in everything, the same way you would submit to Christ, in everything. To her, however, she might not believe EVERYTHING means EVERYTHING. Why would God tell wives to submit in EVERYTHING when EVERYTHING could mean something bad? And what if she believes that “as unto the Lord” DOES mean “only when the request seems like something Christ himself would ask”?

Any input? Fellow men, what would you do? Fellow women, how would you feel if your husband approached you in such a way? Are we too touchy-feely in our modern world that a man cannot simply approach his wife and tell her she is sinning against God and that she had better straighten up before God decides to correct her?