Okay so the title is kind of click-baity because I really don’t consider my wife to be a dummy. She’s actually a pretty intelligent chick, but she IS still a chick, and that means some of the things she says and does make absolutely zero sense to those who view the world through the lens of logic, which means mostly men. Some women out there certainly have the ability to view the world through this lens more often than not (like Jennifer Moleski on YouTube, so far as I can tell), but most women either cannot or will not. Those who know them best know which of the two is the case. I make this post not to disparage my wife but to firstly get some of the married women who visit my blog to understand what type of havoc you are capable of bringing into your husbands life when you fail to control the insanity of what you say and do, and lastly to make married men aware that their wives more than likely can, and will, act this way either by choice or by nature. They will either intentionally do this kind of thing or have no clue they are doing it, which is where her husband has to step in and put a stop to it, otherwise it will never end.
I posted in the past my plan to move out of California to the state of Florida for a number of reasons. I think its a good financial move, with the proceeds of selling our home probably having 30% or more buying power in FL than CA. I think its a good medical move, as the state of CA is STILL enforcing public mask mandates at this time and the governor still talking about COVID like its the black plague and my wife, due to her families medical history, would be a fool to take a vaccine, much less the one plus all the boosters. I think its a good survival move given that states like New York and Washington have made moves towards detaining/arresting citizens who refuse to be vaccinated and holding them in “health facilities” for their own safety and the safety of others, and where these states go, CA will follow. I’m actually shocked that CA didn’t make the first move in this department, but with over 50% of liberal democrats on board with such a plan and the state of CA being mostly liberal democrats and illegal aliens I am merely waiting for the shoe to drop.
All this to say that my decision to move is not simply one made because I am “afraid” as my wife thinks or that I “lack faith in God” as my father things (well, my father AND my wife), its made by looking at many different metrics and coming to the determination that this state is not getting better. In fact, it has not been getting any better since my birth! Born in 1975, the 46 years I have been alive have seen the state of California degrading slowly, year by year, decade by decade. How long does the ship have to sink before a decision to jump off is made?
So, my wife is a person who hates the cold weather and, as she does every year, she has been complaining about it because around here its cold in the winter. Not horribly cold, but we live in an area with a lot of agriculture and that agriculture generates moisture and when the weather is cold its a wet cold that penetrates deep into the bones! She hates it, and I understand.
My wife has been dropping hints about going to Disneyland for the past couple of weeks. I know she wants to go, I do not. Its a waste of money and far to big an effort at this point. Disneyland requires masks. I believe they still require you to pick a specific date you wish to attend the park so they can allow in only enough to enforce quasi-social distancing. Disney is a garbage company and I hate them and I do not want to give them money. However, both my wife and I love original Disney, before the bad times, and I would not have an issue spending some time at Disney World, in Florida, simply because I’ve never been before AND Florida is not imposing such strict restrictions on citizens.
Since my son and his wife moved in my wife has been complaining CONSTANTLY about how messy they are, and they are! We get on to them about cleaning, they stay clean for a while, then they go right back to being messy. Since I work it tends to by my wife who starts cleaning up after them until one of us gets fed up and harps on them again, and the process repeats! She wants them to move out, I want them to move out, yet neither one of us feels like they can yet survive on their own (that’s a long story for another post).
The point is that all three of these things she complains about, and others I have not posted here, could easily be resolved if she would just stop fighting with me on moving. Florida has warm weather all year round – PROBLEM SOLVED! I already told her we would hit up Disney World after moving – PROBLEM SOLVED! If we are moving my son has no choice but to save every last dollar and find somewhere else to live – PROBLEM SOLVED! But no! She has to fight and argue with me about moving all while complaining about staying! ITS MADNESS!
On occasion she will get more frustrated than normal and talk about how she wants to “just pack up and run away”, and that I shouldn’t be surprised to come home one day to find her gone. Now, she may just be venting, I don’t know, and who could know with women these days, but it frustrates me to no end that this woman, whom I know to be intelligent, wants to weigh the option of simply packing a bag and running away with no plan, no home, no money and no job skills against the prospect of following a carefully crafted plan of moving WITH money, WITH a new home in waiting, WITH my continued working ALL BECAUSE SHE WANTS TO REBEL!? And that’s really what it breaks down to. She doesn’t want a husband who will hold authority over her, she wants someone who will continue to pay the bills and let her remain comfortably on her own. Oh sure she cleans the house and occasionally cooks and puts out for sex, but allow her husband to dictate the direction of his home, his money and his family? Absolutely not! That’s out of the comfort zone and not permitted!
Ladies, think about what you are doing and saying. Are you making your husbands life more difficult? Are you helpful or a hindrance? If you are a christian wife then, guess what? Well planned or not, your husbands decisions are decisions you are duty bound to go along with and obey. You can question, you can protest, but in the end you MUST obey because as a christian wife that’s what you signed up for! If you didn’t know this when you got married well, guess what, you know it now! The ignorance has been removed (emphasis mine):
22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
Don’t feel targeted, husbands have their own commandments from the Lord toward their wives, so this is no one-sided commandment. Now, however, you see the words in scripture, and ignorance can no longer be an excuse, only rebellion and disobedience!
Do not cause your husband confusion, frustration and irritation! I was once told by a marriage counselor that husbands should listen to their wives and not offer solutions, simply listen. Well I say that wives shouldn’t complain to their husbands unless they want solutions to their problems! Men are problem solvers, and if we see an issue we can resolve we will recommend a fix! The advice of marriage counselors and women’s magazines is moronic and encourages discontentment! Maybe some of you remember the video of the woman with the nail in her head complaining of a headache to her husband. He recommended removing the literal nail from her head and all she could do was tell him to stop offering to fix the problem, but instead to just hear her out. The woman in the video was acting like a dumb child. Don’t be that woman.
Men, if your wife does this to you it will not end until you put a stop to it. I find myself having to prepare for what I know will be a fight when I tell my wife to stop complaining to me about her hang ups when I have already offered a solution. If she wants a different solution then she can think one up herself, but I have already had my say and I refuse to listen to her complaining any more. Since every christian woman is feminist-lite, my wife included, it will be seen as a snub, a literal “I don’t love you anymore” in her eyes and she will act accordingly. We, as christian men, must stand strong in the authority given us even when it means that our wives will likely give us the trusty old cold-shoulder or, somethings, things even worse. In the end we must stand before God and give an account, and the very first book in the bible contains the passage, “Because thou hast harkened unto the voice of thy wife….”, which should serve as a warning to all men. A man should know his wife well enough to know when her advice is warranted and when it should be discarded, and he should also be able to tell her “no” when needed, without fear of the repercussions. Ideally a christian wife would rarely, if ever, offer repercussions, understanding her place in the marriage, as assigned by God, but such are the times we live in.
I hope this post made sense, and I hope that at some point some man or woman may read it and gain some understanding or courage or wisdom from it. As for me, well, I guess we will see where this all goes, but I can no longer sit and listen to the complaints, and I know I’m not the only one out there with this issue. And, ladies, just stop doing this. It really does make your husband think you are a big dummy, or worse.