For the past few weeks I’ve been hearing people go on and on about the song WAP by Cardi B and how horrendous it is for women everywhere. For the record I know OF Cardi B, but I am proud to say that I have zero clue who she actually is beyond the ramblings of some of the political people I watch on YouTube, most of which were talking about her in response to her interview with Presidential hopeful Joe Biden and the song in question. In reference to the song I have heard numerous rumblings about how it’s degrading to women, how it has sent women back decades in their struggle for equality, that it reduces women to sex objects, and so on.

For those of you who don’t know WAP is short for “Wet A** Pu**y” (fill in the blanks) and the song is essentially this ugly woman with some of her ugly friends talking about how they use their bodies to get what they want out of men (Now that I think of it, I remember now that Cardi B also used her body to drug men and steal from them on more than one occasion in her youth. I guess I know a bit more about her than I thought). In all honesty its not a horrible song as far as subject matter goes. I would be lying if I didn’t say that my wife and I have our own playlist of songs that one wouldn’t play in public we enjoy listening and dancing to when we have our own play time at home, and trust me, the lyrics are likely much more vulgar that the ones included in WAP. This song, however, is just….well, bad. Its not even really music its just women talking over a bass line, and not a very good one at that. I wasn’t impressed one bit, and in the video only one woman looked remotely hot, and that wasn’t saying much considering the other women were nowhere near hot.

Anyone who knows me here knows I am a christian but I am far from being a prude. I think married couples can benefit a lot from watching adult material (porn) and think it can be used to great benefit when it comes to wives learning how to keep their husbands happy sexually. What I am NOT about, though, is children and young adults getting mixed in with things intended for adults and porn is definitely on that list. I would no more encourage a 15 year old to watch adult material as I would for them to slam a few shots of tequila, and that’s where the real damage from this song is going to come from.

You see, if I mention “Cardi B” to a group of grade school kids they will undoubtedly go on and on about how great an artist she is and how great this song or that song is, which is bad enough in itself. However if I were to mention, say, Lords of Acid, most of them would have no idea who I was talking about, though LoA has been writing songs that would probably make Cardi B blush for over a decade.

Lords of Acid are not mainstream with kids, while Cardi B is.

Of course the fault doesn’t really lie with Cardi B but with parents who allow their kids to listen to her music at 8, 9, 10, 12 years of age. Parents who allow their children to watch her music videos which likely feature her undulating suggestively across cars, men, animals or what not (I honestly couldn’t say because I’ve never seen any), all things young girls should not be doing or watching be done.  We have, however, a society that idolizes women that act in this way and, in turn, we have generations of women who have gotten progressively more vulgar and less feminine.

That women sing about their ability to control men via their bodies is nothing new, though the blatant vulgarity of it certainly is. I recall a song I enjoy from the 1940’s in which the woman singing proclaims:

If I invite
A boy some night
To dine on my fine Finnan haddie,
I just adore
His asking for more,
But my heart belongs to daddy.

Finnan haddie is fish, and you can only guess what the lyric alludes to (“My Heart Belongs to Daddy”, Cole Porter, 1938), but at least the lyric lent to the imagination, whereas modern music simply screams “stick your face between my legs”. There’s something to be said for subtleness, but apparently that has been lost through the generations. Either way, what Cardi B is saying is not untrue: Women’s sexuality is extremely powerful, perhaps the most powerful force on planet earth. No other prize has caused so much trouble yet brought about so much innovation and drive as female sexuality. Men will do nearly anything to obtain it and a woman who can use it well has almost godlike power over the opposite sex. Personally I still think that the wife of Prince Harry, who’s name escapes me, must do things in the sack that men only dream of, and she must do them well, to cause a man who literally had a kingdom at his fingertips to leave it all behind. Not that he seems very bright to begin with, but history, I think, would side with me here. Many a kingdom has fallen over the wiles of a woman who has mastered using her body to please powerful men. Not only kingdoms but marriages, companies, industries!

All in all I don’t think conservatives or christians should panic too much over the songs contents so much as the songs target audience. In fact, I would suggest that a woman who could utilize this song along with some dancing for her husband might find herself the object of a wellspring of affection for the better part of a couple of weeks if she would take the time and effort to do so.

Personally, however, I’d go with Lords of Acid.